Wouldn't ever gag you with a spoon, my only true love,
Never really heard you speak that way, it's unworthy of ...
Funny how that little college girl called language corrupt,
Funny how the other private schools had no HAPA Club.

Someone took a trip before you came to ski in the Alps,
Your father moved across the country,
Just to sunburn his scalp,
Contra Costa, contra mundum, contradict what I say,
Living like the French Connection, but we'll die in LA.

Blasted from a disconnected light switch,
Through the condo that they'll never finish,
Bounce across a Saudi satellite dish,
Through your brain to California English.

No one sits inside a freezing flat and stays there til May,
Leafing through a stack of A-Zed's to surf the UK,
Waiting with the wind against your face,
And gel in your hair,
Shivering in little undershirts, but doesn't seem to care.

Blasted from a disconnected light switch,
Through the condo that they'll never finish,
Bounce across a Saudi satellite dish,
Through your brain to California English.

Sweet carob rice cake,
She don't care how the sweets taste,
Fake Philly cheese steak,
But she use real toothpaste.

Cuz if that Tom's don't work,
If it just makes you worse,
Would you lose all your faith in the good Earth?

And if it's all a curse,
And we're just getting worse,
Baby, please don't lose your faith in the good Earth.

Blasted from a disconnected light switch,
Through the condo that they'll never finish,
Bounce across a Saudi satellite dish,
Through your brain to California English.